I split with my daughter’s father over 4 years ago now. I remember people telling us we should stay together for the kids. I’ve heard if from family and friends, I’ve read it in magazines articles, etc. I personally think that this particular piece of advice is wrong. On the contrary, I actually came to the conclusion I was ready to move out for the kids. Let me explain.
There came a moment where I could choose to overlook many things and choose to stay in an unhappy relationship “for the sake of the children”.
I don’t think its better for children to see their parents in a loveless marriage, to be subjected to a dysfunctional, wounded marriage. To see their parents lose their joy.
I wanted my kid and step kids to know that it wasn’t ok to settle for a loveless and unhappy marriage. I wanted them to know that their personal happiness and self-respect was still important after having children. I wanted to know that you didn’t have to be shackle by a mistake for the rest of your life. I wanted them to know they could split when the relationship reached a point where there is no fixing or healing to be done. I wanted the kids to know that love is possible.