People who take a patronising tone drive me bonkers. I cannot stand people who look at you with a smile with they belittle and degrade you. It’s an automatic trigger for me and I react strongly.
Sarcasm can be a fun mode of communication when both parties are engaged, but not when it is used as a way to manipulate you and degrade you.
The worst part is that if you in any way react to it, you are most likely to be told you are “too sensitive.” This effectively dismisses any arguments you may have against being treated this way.
Employers may even protect patronising employees stating that that’s simply their way, they don’t mean anything by it. This also effectively dismisses any arguments you may have against being treated this way.
The not so funny part is that person is probably constantly having temper tantrums every time their big bad ego is faced with realistic feedback, but somehow it’s the victim is the hypersensitive one, apparently. I know that it has been my experience at the office when dealing with patronising co-workers. Fortunately, I have always been firm on not accepting patronising tone and the employer eventually back off and asked that the coworker in question take another approach when addressing me.
When you are in a relationship with someone who is patronising, after being treated like a child and constantly challenged for expressing yourself, you’ll eventually start to develop a sense of hyper-vigilance about voicing your thoughts and opinions without reprimand. You will probably go over the conversation in your mind before you speak and adjust according to how you believe your spouse will react. This self-censorship enables the abuser to put in less work in silencing you because you begin to silence yourself.
Whenever you are met with a condescending demeanour or tone, call it out firmly and assertively and don’t back down. The not backing down is the key because there will be resistance. You don’t deserve to be spoken down to like a child nor should you ever silence yourself to meet the expectation of someone else’s superiority complex.