There are only a few things I hope my children will listen to when it comes to relationship advice:

Financial Independence

woman-1245926_1920Be able to walk away and continue your life without help. Don’t get trapped by being dependent.

As a child, I remember hearing about an aunt who got a divorce and couldn’t get any financial help because according to the banks, she didn’t exist. All the bills were in her ex-husband’s name. She had no credit information under her own identity. I promised myself then, that it wouldn’t happen to me. I would always have a way out.

When I got separated after 10 years, people assumed I was a struggling single mother. The fact is that I ended up being better off financially than when I was in the relationship. Being to stand on one’s two feet is very liberating.

Domestic Violence

Once is too much. Often women wonder if their partner punches them once and apologises immediately, maybe he really meant it, maybe it won’t happen again.

Have you ever accidentally punched someone? Me neither. Once they find that they can get away with it, it will happen again and again, until it’s a regular thing. Do not accept their apology.

It’s extremely rare that it only happens once. Honestly, once should tell you all you need to know about the person. Violence doesn’t equal love. It’s a weak attempt at dominating and controlling because they lack the ability to reason with you and talk things through. Leave while you can.