Letting go of suspicion

When I originally read an article that said Selena Gomez had received a kidney transplant over the summer thanks to the donation from her one of her friends, Francia Raísa, I was happy for her and silently wished that everyone was lucky enough to have a friend who is not only willing to be a donor but also compatible.

I work with a coworker and friend who also received a transplant. She was on the transplant list for years never knowing if she would get one in time. She received the kidney from someone who passed away. It does play on someone’s emotions and mental wellbeing when you feel guilty about being happy you received the transplant. You’ve wished to find that kidney for years and have a chance to a longer life, but you feel guilty that it had to come at someone else’s expense. She went through post-surgery depression and it took her a while before bouncing back and being able to return to work.

Getting a transplant from someone who’s alive and will keep on living erases some of that guilt. Or at least, I sincerely hope it does.

Then I read that the friend that did the donation has been harassed online for being fake, for doing a good deed for fame and/or money and it broke my heart. This was good news. There is enough bad news in the world, can’t we just be happy for people when something good happens?  Why can’t we believe that someone would do this out of friendship or kindness? What does it matter to us the reasoning behind her decision?

It truly breaks my heart that people are not only unable to let go of their cynical hostility for one minute and that they feel entitled to attack a young woman who underwent surgery and gave away a kidney.  This is not acceptable behaviour. Grumble all you want, but don’t make someone else life miserable because you are.


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