I used to be the best at problem solving

Now it feels like I am moving my mind through very thick molasses when I am trying to solve a problem.

It happens sometimes at work when I have to solve a problem that should be solved easily. Suddenly I’m hit by a brain fog and I forget everything I have learned.

It’s like sitting in an exam of a subject you have never studied. It makes me feel like such an idiot.

I’m trying to stay positive. It’s not always easy, especially when you are called into a meeting with your boss and are told by yourthat you need to get better or find a way to be like you were before because your work speed as dropped down considerably. He made me feel like I’m going to lose my job because of my health issues. I’m giving everything I have and then some and it’s still not enough. I know that legally, he can’t do so, but there are other ways. He can always say that I’m unable to fulfill the requirement of the job after over a decade of working there.

Then I go to the doctors and they are all excited that I’m trying a new medication and that my sleep apnea has been diagnosed. There all very positive about my health. They all think it’s all too early to think about disability as there is still hope for some improvement. Not much, but some.

It really feels like I’m too sick to work and not sick enough for disability. That doesn’t bode well when I have a family to feed.

 

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