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What the butterfly symbol means to me

The butterfly symbol represent different chronic illness, such as Fibromyalgia and Lupus. I used to like it because it’s beautiful. Now I draw a different meaning from it.

Chronic Illness - Sense of Self - TransformationWhen you find your body failing you and you lose the physical capacity to do the things that make you you, your sense of who you are is shaken to its core. I used to be outside, in the forest, hiking, every single weekend. I haven’t been in about 3 years because my legs and back no longer support me enough to enjoy the activity that use to bring me peace of mind and joy.

You go through the stages of grief and also have to live through those stages as the people who surround you do the same. It’s important to remember that we’re all doing the best that we can in each given moment in time.

You go through the pain and then you realize that you must replace what use to be with new activities that you will enjoy and that will fill you with the same peace of mind and happiness that the activities you can no longer do used to bring to you. This transformation can take years in the making, but when you come out of it, you have a new sens of who you are.

This is why I’ve been looking at the butterfly symbol to add as a tattoo as a constant reminder that transformation is difficult, but when you emerge, you are more beautiful than you were before.

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