What is a good parent? How do we know if we are one? That is questions I’ve asked myself multiple time as my child grew up.
To be a good parent is not to be perfect or irreproachable.
Being good parents doesn’t mean looking like the perfect postcard. It’s not to be a bottomless bank. Class doesn’t dictate if a parent is good or not. It’s not about saying yes to everything and to allow everything. On the contrary, that creates little entitled monsters.
A good parent is not one who never makes mistakes. Children aren’t born with instruction books, nor are they all the same. The good parent is not the one who never shouts in anger or who is never gets at the end of his nerves.
What makes the good parent is the unconditional love.
The fury that we feel as parents if even one of his hair was harmed. It’s the one who does not turn his back on her/his family. It’s the one who never gives up, even when she/he feels despair. It’s the one who always comes back. The one who cherishes, preserves and cultivates the natural trust and the fabulous love his little one feels for her/his child.
A good parent wants to transmit her/his knowledge. He is reassuring when the child needs reassurance. It’s the parent who tries to understand, guide and push further. It is she/he who has not forgotten what kind of kid she/he was himself .
A good parent is one who knows how to come back and apologize when she/he goes too far. She/He is the one who teaches humility and forgiveness, and never denies her/his vulnerability. Who never pretends to be anything but a human. He who teaches the right to the error and especially that to take again. The good parent is one who never abuses his parental authority to not admit that he does not always know what to do.
I am not a perfect mother.
I am a daughter of two imperfect parents who made me want to live, discover and grow. I am a parent with crazy love for my child and stepchildren.
I’m now old enough and wise enough to write with deep gratitude and be fully aware of everything I’ve received growing up. I can only hope that I give as much to my children now that it’s my turn to raise a little tribe.