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Friendships tend to change over time

Friendships tend to change over time, which can lead some friends to move away from each other. In such circumstances, some people may feel isolated and left out. Here’s how to deal with this situation.

Everyone experiences changes in their lives and their friendships. Sometimes these changes may cause friends to move away from each other, especially if their needs are not being met or if they no longer share certain interests. It’s a common situation that many people go through, but it can be difficult to cope with, especially if you’re starting to feel lonely and excluded.

Here are some situations that can make your friendship change:     

  • Moving household;     
  • Transferred to another school;     
  • A new girlfriend or boyfriend;   
  • Develops a close relationship with another friend;     
  • Getting very involved in extracurricular activities;    
  • Problems that do not relate directly to the friendship relationship (such as illness);     
  • interests and hobbies that you share with a friend change;     

If your friendship changes and no longer meets your needs, you have every right to feel sad, hurt, jealous or even angry about the way things are going. Here are some ways you can handle the situation:

Give yourself some time

Try to leave a bit of play to your friendship so that it can grow. It may take some time for things to adjust.    

Talk about it in person

Tell your friend how you feel about your friendship with her or him. She or He may feel the same thing.

Stay positive

Ŧry not to accuse your friend and not to blame him for the situation. Focus on each other’s strengths and what you both can do to improve your friendship.     

Establish clear expectations

Explain your needs to your friend and be specific! Ask her or him what his needs are in return. Discussing the expectations you both have can help you set boundaries to make you feel happier in friendship.     

Take a break

If your friendship makes you feel depressed, maybe you should take a break and spend time outside of the relationship. For example, you could try a new extracurricular activity, indulge in a hobby, or do another activity that interests you to change your mind.     

Express what you feel

You could write your feelings in a newspaper or express them by singing, dancing, creating art or doing another activity that you like.  Open the line of communication.  

Meet new friends

Look for people you would like to know better in your community. You may even get close to people you already know and make new friends based on those relationships.     

Move on

If you have tried to reconnect with your friend, but your needs are still not being met, it may be time to move on and focus on the other relationships in your life.     

Remember that history doesn’t make friendship. Anyone who is not encouraging and championing your truth, your dreams, your goals, your evolution, your short comings, helping you pull out the best version of yourself and calling you out on your shit, shouldn’t be called a friend.

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