The best advice I can give to my children is stay single until you find someone worthy. Stay on your own until you find someone who works to maintain your relationship. You shouldn’t be the only putting in all the effort in the relationship. You should be with someone who understands that relationships are two-way and should never be one-way.
I understand that the pressure to be in a relationship is great. So many time you will hear that there is some kind of time limit to find true love. That is completely false.
Stay single until you find someone who is mature enough to take on the responsibilities that come with love. Someone who realizes that laziness has no place in a serious relationship.
Stay on your own until you find someone who treats you well, without waiting for anything in exchange. I once dated a someone who kept tabs of everything we did for each other, both financially and otherwise. He would refuse to help or be nice if it was “my turn”. He isn’t an ex for nothing. Find someone who treats you well because you deserve it and because he wants to see you smile. Make sure your relationship is healthy.
Stay single until you find someone who makes efforts to have a conversation with you. Someone who listens to you when you speak. Someone who turns off his phone when you enter a room.
Stay on your own until you find someone who makes efforts to make you feel included. Someone who invites you out with his friends. Someone who takes you to dinner with his family.
Stay single until you find someone who is making efforts when having sex. Someone who takes care of your desires. Someone who gives as much as he receives.
Stay on your own until you find someone who does the dishes and laundry when you have had a hard day, to give you the opportunity to rest. Someone who puts your favorite perfume when he is about to join you. This is really important. Not only because a healthy relationship is a partnership, but one day if you fall sick and cannot take care of the house, you know you have someone who will step up and help without resentment.
You may be thinking that this someone doesn’t exist. I used to joke that that someone had drowned in the sea and I would be forever alone because of this tragedy. Guess what? I met that someone in my late 30’s and we have been married for two years. It hasn’t been easy. We’ve gone through financial issues, mental health issues, physical health issues. Through it all, the love is always there, the support is always there, we are a team. I am truly grateful for this man.
Stay single until you find someone worthy.